the heart wants what it wants
by guesswhofern
Summary: Breaking up is not always a disaster. Sometime it just happens.


She knocks on Ryan's apartment door and waits for him to open the door. Clarke wants to make it as easy for him as possible. He opens the door and lets her in.

She turns around and gets right to the point.

"You know why I'm here. I'm sorry. I just can't do this anymore. All I do is hurt both of us."

"You really fell in love with him, didn't you?"

She's choking up. "Yes, I did. I'm so sorry."

More tears are forming and he can't take it anymore. He takes her into arms and holds her up.

"You couldn't help it. I can understand it. I wasn't here much in the last few months and Bellamy was. I can't blame him… you're an amazing woman. He should feel happy."

She's hugging him tighter and chuckles. "Trust me, he'll be happy once I tell him. But you need to know that I tried to fight it, Ryan, but nothing worked. He didn't leave and I didn't want him to. He didn't even try anything. He only showed his affection and his feelings when I did something, like leaning into him or hugging him without a reason. He never tried to take me away from you," she tells him, not looking at him.

"Octavia was the one who told me that he might feel more than friendship. Only when I asked him did he confirm it. Bell said he tried not to be too obvious and fought against his feelings as well. He knew I was happy with you. I'm sorry I'm telling you this, but I want you to know the truth and I never lied to you before and I won't start now. You can trust me when I tell you we didn't do anything yet. We never slept in a bed together. We may have fallen asleep on the couch together when we were having a movie night, but that happened dozens of times over the last five years of our friendship. Nothing. All we did was spending time together and holding hands. Bellamy only kissed me once and we felt guilty afterward. After that I told him we shouldn't do it again until I told you and he agreed. He never wanted to hurt you."

He looks at her face now. "It hurts, but I can understand it. I knew something like this could happen. Even when I was still here and not away on all those trips I noticed the sparks. He's a good man and I always liked him. I know you'll be great together."

He smiles at her takes her face in his hands. "All I ever wanted was for you to be happy. I'm sad it's not me causing your happiness anymore, but I know he can and will make you happy."

She's blinking to get rid of the tears. "That really means a lot to hear you say that. For not calling me hurtful things. You're still one of my closest friends, even though I'm breaking up with you. I'll give you all the time you need to heal and think and have fun, but I would love to see you again."

"Just give me some time and I'll be fine. I'll promise I'll text or call you."

Now she's the one who's smiling and he's joining in. "Thank you. You're amazing, girls will line up to date you." she tells him and hugs him again.

He presses one last kiss on her temple and steps back, grinning at her. "Get out of here. I know he's waiting somewhere outside."

She's looking like she's been caught but nods. "I'll see you. Thank you." With this words she leaves his apartment to meet Bellamy in the park five minutes away.

* * *

Bellamy can see her smiling from where he's sitting on a bench near the water. He's been wandering around the park for the most part, but sits down when she sends him a message telling him she's on her way.

She sits down next to him once she's there.

Bellamy puts his arm around her and pulls her closer, lacing their free hands on his lap.

"How did it go?"

She sighs and leans against him. He can see she's sad, but happy and that's a good sign.

"It went smoother than I thought it would. He's disappointed, but not mad. Ryan said he knew this might happen and he doesn't blame you. I told him the truth. He's such a great person. He promised to text me when he feels like it."

"I'm glad. I always had fun with him and I don't like it when people hate me," Bellamy answers.

Clarke chuckles. "I know. You're the worst when people don't like you. Like a lost puppy," she teases him.

"Hey, that's not a nice thing to say to your boyfriend!"

She turns to him when he says boyfriend and grins at him. "Say it again."

He rolls his eyes but obeys. "Boyfriend. That's what I am, right? I'm your boyfriend now."

She's nodding and doesn't seem to stop. "Yes, yes, yes, you are!"

He smiles and presses his forehead against hers and asks one last time. "Are you sure?"

She smiles and closes her eyes. "I've never been more sure in my life."

He doesn't need to be told twice. Bellamy finally has the girl he loves in his arms and she's his. She's gonna be his forever if she wants to.

He breaks the kiss after a few minutes, because both don't want to show affection in public.

"You know, I feel sorry for him, but I'm really really happy about your decision. You don't know how long I've waited for this," he tells her.

She chuckles. "Maybe I do. Tell me."

He rolls his eyes but obeys. "Such a demanding princess. Do you remember when we went to that water park a few years ago? You were screaming, not because you were scared, but out of excitement and you looked at me and in that moment I knew what those feelings meant that I've developed for you. That was the moment I knew I wanted more than just friendship."

She looks shocked. "That's almost two years ago, Bell! We shared a room that weekend."

"I know. I had so much fun that weekend. And apparently you can't sleep without sleeping on someone, because I woke up with you on top of me and our legs were tangled."

"I told you before! It's not my fault."

He laughs again. "I know, I know. I didn't say I didn't like it. Now I don't have to feel guilty about it ever again. And I can kiss you whenever I want.

She smiles at him. "Yes, and in fact you should do it right now."

He doesn't mind it one bit and does as he's told.

He softly presses his lips against hers and what he feels can only be described as happiness and love.

Clarke's feeling exactly the same.

Both know it's the beginning of something great.


End file.
